Yesterday I was sitting having lunch and reading from my copy of “Master the Day” by Alexander Heyne, when one particular line jumped right off the page and smacked me, “The only industries that successfully sell silver bullets (make money, weight loss, manifesting your dreams) sell them because they know that people know the truth but don’t want to accept it and do the work.” In this one single thought why we sit in our mediocre lives instead of moving forward with the steps needed to live phenomenal lives became a little more clearer. We don’t want to make the choices to do the work and do it.
Why in the world would we allow ourselves to remain in mediocrity, when we could be phenomenal with just small changes, patience and time? I believe that it’s “comfortable” (well maybe not), “safe” (possibly), it’s “not risky” (maybe). There are a lot of situations that we allow ourselves to remain in, such as poor health, because of food choices and lack of exercise, average or low paying jobs, because of “at least I have a job mentality”, and sad relationships, because we work too hard at our average jobs and our health is too poor to have the energy to play a game or take a walk with our family.
What if it’s actually a lizard problem? What if it’s a primitive reaction, that has been trained and massaged throughout your life to “be safe, to freeze, and turn from danger,or in fact to run”? The lizard’s name is the Amygdala, it is part of your brain, it controls your fear , your fight or flight or freeze response. Until you learn to tame your lizard, your life will tend to be controlled by it because you will make “safe, path of least resistance” choices.
The crazy thing is our lizard has been trained very well to keep us safe which is of great value, but have we been trained too well to be so sensitive to the lizard response to not be able to tell it to “sit and stay” while we measure whether the “risk” is eminent physical danger, or discomfort from the “unknown” at a psychological level.
Why is this differentiation so important? Because if what you have been doing over and over again is not working for you, and you know that you know, that if you choose to take a baby step or a giant leap in a different direction that your results will be improved, but you are afraid to move because you “might fail”, then you need to silence your lizard. But if your lizard is telling you that if you try drugs to enhance your results their is a good chance you will die or become addicted and it won’t help you in the end. This lizard is doing it’s job well. The value of differentiation!
The lizard will stay “content”, sort of if you stay, still. You will stay unhealthy (danger), under employed (danger) with mediocre relationships (danger). Your lizard probably had some aches.
The thing is everyone wants to be noticed, everyone wants to make a difference to someone, but we settle everyday in little ways. We all know or have ideas of what little choices we could make that would improve our lot in life or bring us some pleasure and joy. Even our lizard craves it.
So you really don’t need a life coach, you need to just train your lizard better. But and here is the BIG BUT, it’s sometimes more fun to train with a “friend” someone who encourages your success and helps you rise from your failures and pushes you towards the goal when you are stalled. As “pack” animals it also gives us a sense of security. So you don’t need me, but is you want my help…
Let me introduce myself HI MY NAME IS CANDY, LIZARD TRAINER EXTRAORDINAIRE!