I came to the realization today that humans are very strange indeed. We claim to be rational and logical and yet we are driven by something way different then logic or rational thinking.
In the month of August 2002, my soon to be husband and I bought our first home together. We were moving some stuff in and planning on spending our first night together in our new home. Tim realized that he had forgotten his toothbrush at his parents house (that is just a few houses away). I offered to run over and get it for him.
I did not know when I went there for a simple toothbrush that our family would be changed.
I went into his parents home and was on the way to his bedroom when two little fur balls came running over to my feet. To look at them they were identical babies, twins.
I proceeded to get what I came for, went back to my new home, and asked if we could bring the two little kittens home. He of course said “No”. I asked again, with the same result. So of course I asked again, and again, and again. Until I got a “well okay”!
Wasn’t many days till those two little fur balls came home. We had to then come up with names. We ran through a list of the usual cat names, and nothing stuck. Then my genius of a man came up with “Dun’no and Askit”. He said if anyone asked us their names, we could say “Dun’no, Askit.” Their names brought a lot of giggles through the years. Genius!
They were pretty good cats, doing cat things. Like ignoring us unless they wanted attention, demanding that we be there own personal doormen, wanting food on their schedule. Typical cats.
One night maybe ten years in, one of the sisters, scooted out the door. (They were never supposed to know the great outdoors, but that’s another story.) They liked to go outside in the summer months but never left our yard. That night her stubborn determination to slip out into the dark probably turned her into a snack for a roving fisher that we had not known had moved into the neighbourhood. We searched but never found a trace of her. A sad day indeed.
We still had Dun’no, who still ignored us until she the “queen of the house”, wanted something. And then she would demand and we would cave.
Then things changed a few years back in our relationship. We were going on vacation, and we had it arranged for someone to come and live at our house while we were away to take care of our pets. Well we thought it was arranged, they backed out the night before.
We hustled and called, and my mother-in-law said she would take care of the dog and come over daily and take care of the cat and the fish. Which she did. She likes cats a lot so Dun’no was well cared for, but even so she was still alone a lot (with the radio on) while we were away.
When we came home, Dun’no became Kiggy (my oldest daughter started this nick name). She was a changed cat. She couldn’t get enough of us. Waking me up multiple times a night just to be pet. Needing ‘sooth my cat music’ at night to know she wasn’t alone while we slept. We were important to her. We WERE her’s.
Well as time always does it kept moving along, and she kept getting older. Her hips got a little week. It was harder to keep weight on her. She was an ol’ girl, but lovingly devoted, regularly coming for snuggles and attention.
The last couple of months she started loosing a lot of weight. She ate well, still snuggled and purred. We needed to get puppy pads because she didn’t always go to the litter box, but she would pee on the pads.
She decided that after all these years of dining on the floor, that she was old enough to join us at the table and thought that eating off our plates was fine. I decided that setting a place for her on a chair with her cat food was what I could do for such an old faithful girl. She seemed to like that.
Then a couple days ago things took a bad turn. She couldn’t get around well. Worse than normal. But her heart was strong and her spirit stronger and she would not let go. I was forced to make a choice for my friend. I had to let go of my faithful friend of nearly 19 years.
As we were gathering her up in a warm fuzzy blanket to take her on her last drive, it came to me, “humans are strange indeed.”
Over and over again, we choose to open our homes and our hearts to little beings that we can almost certainly know that we will outlive. We open our hearts to the pain of loss and grief for a few short years of love and faithful companionship. Are we not logical beings? Is it not reasonable that we should avoid things that we know will give us pain?
More then reasonable logic, we have a much stronger drive. A drive that can sometimes lead us to grief or pain. It can even drive us into bad relationships. But it can also bring us joy, peace and laughter.
That drive is our need for love, and acceptance, as well as to give love and acceptance. Love trumps logic!
Sometimes we hurt for the privilege of the love of a pet that is so innocent and true. Or the love of a partner or friend that turns out not to be so innocent and true.
We were made for love, it calms us, it strengthens us. I know Kiggy’s fur has absorbed more than one round of my tears through the years. And I know her happiness was true sitting on my lap by the fire being stroked and loved, so simple and easy. So logic be damned, and humans be strange, and continue to love, because even though it hurts, love is what we are made for!
With love my ol’girl thanks for the lessons! 2002-2021