Half a century in the blink of an eye!

Breakfast in bed, with school work, perfect!

I was a little disappointed this morning. I woke up and did not feel any wiser at all.

Somehow I thought that if one was turning as old as I am today, with all the life experiences that I have encountered, I should wake up smarter or wiser or something.

Funny, I really don’t feel much different than yesterday, except maybe a little sad, that I didn’t slow down and bask in life’s experiences more as I was passing through.

The lessons learned young about hurrying along, get up, get dressed, get breakfast,get to school/church/work, get back home, get changed, get to bed, repeat. Not sure how wise these lessons were. With 50 years gone by and the memories of those days quickly slipping away.

One more day, a day of conversation, or togetherness with some of the people I loved and are no more, what a precious gift that would be, if time could freeze for a moment and one could appreciate the heart beat of time as it was happening, basking in pure love and adoration .

Memories, memories, even these are unfaithful and slip and transform in my reckoning. Cruel is the mind!

Please don’t get me wrong, I am not in mourning, or grasped by great sorrow, but only nostalgic for what was and is no more.

In youth you do not understand as time seems to go by at a slow, slow pace and you wish your life away, one hurry up at a time.

I am wise enough to know how I am extremely blessed. A God who loves me, a family to care for me, friends to challenge and celebrate me, no more would a wise person ask for, because nothing else is as sweet.

Today is my birthday, and today I choose to absorb every moment, to slow down and not hurry, to open my senses, to absorb all expressions of love.

Thank you to all that make this journey of life more amazing to me!

Tis the season to be raging

What if this last few weeks of 2020, the incredible year, we gave ourselves permission to own our emotions? To admit we are NOT okay. To acknowledge the times we pretended we were fine but were really hurt or angry. What if we saught out those stumbling blocks that throw themselves back in our face over and over and perform a funeral for them and send them packing for good. What if we could start 2021 brand new, reborn, without the baggage? What if we told ourselves the truth? What if?