Blog – Page 24 – Beautiful Remade

|Living in full colour

By: Just myself December 14, 2020

What is your favourite colour? When you think of this colour, what do you feel? I don’t mean on the surface but what deep emotions does this colour stir in your soul?

My children must have asked me what my favourite colour is a million times a million or more times. Depending on the day my answer sometimes changes, or my go to answer is sometimes all the colours of the rainbow.

Today I am feeling pink! A new shade of pink, bright, vivid, alive!

I feel new today. Is because of a good nights rest, my new piece of art I purchased and finally got to bring home and hang up last night, is it the warmer weather, although still grey?

Maybe it’s the way my bedroom is coming together, or the “stuff” I got rid of yesterday that is no longer bogging my spirit down.

Maybe it is my resolve to declutter my household, of stuff, of habits, of lies, of frustration, of darkness!

There is still so much to do, because rose colour glasses are not working for me anymore. Truth needs to be the very air I breathe.

For a moment I felt pink, bright, vivid, alive pink!

What are the hard truths I need to face to be genuine pink again?

Tis the season to be raging

By: Just myself December 13, 2020

Blog# rebirth, #letting go, #new year, #rageLeave a Comment

What if this last few weeks of 2020, the incredible year, we gave ourselves permission to own our emotions? To admit we are NOT okay. To acknowledge the times we pretended we were fine but were really hurt or angry. What if we saught out those stumbling blocks that throw themselves back in our face over and over and perform a funeral for them and send them packing for good. What if we could start 2021 brand new, reborn, without the baggage? What if we told ourselves the truth? What if?

The truth of the matter is…

By: Just myself December 12, 2020

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I realized this morning I don’t have a healthy relationship with anger or ego. My avoidance of conflict and my sponge (mind) not throwing the garbage out that people have told me about “me” has left me in a state of unrest. Unrest in my soul, unrest in my body.

If I do not soon find a way of dealing with the anger inside of me, I may go stark raving mad. Or my heart will just quit under the pressure.

I am a “good” person. I on occasion make poor decisions, and I do “react” badly to situations sometimes. For the most part though I just roll with the punches, absorb or deflect other peoples crap, search for joy and move on, doing everything I can to help others be comfortable.

I am hurt, wounded deeply in my soul. I have had words, lies and accusations thrown at me, that have cut me to the very core of my being.

I have post traumatic stress, and it effects me every day.

The truth of the matter is…I am NOT okay!

But now that I have admitted it, I can work on finding the tools I need, the help I need, and I will be okay again.

“Professionals Show Up Everyday!”

By: Just myself December 11, 2020

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I just finished reading “Turning Pro by Steven Pressfield”. By “just” I mean I finished it about three o’clock this morning, after being awake from about 1 am.

As you can imagine my mind is not on this morning after a less than restful sleep, and I have been whining to myself about writing my blog today. I could just give myself the day off right. What would one day, out of the trenches, hurt anyway?

Then the rules of Steven’s book came to mind…and the number one rule on his list is that “professionals show up everyday”!

<p value="<amp-fit-text layout="fixed-height" min-font-size="6" max-font-size="72" height="80">How could I not show up here, push through the <em>"pain"</em> and post something motivational for you?How could I not show up here, push through the “pain” and post something motivational for you?

What is something you are avoiding today, that you need to be professional about?

Today I choose to be professional at life as a whole, I AM GOING TO SHOW UP! Don’t let another day slip past you, show up with bells on!

Habit Inventory: THE NEW YEAR COMETH: What works, What doesn’t!

By: Just myself December 10, 2020

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Have you ever considered what you do or how you react to others?

A wise saying is “If you do the same thing over and over, you will get the same result.” or “When you stop hitting your head against the wall, and use the door, the pain will stop!”

How many areas of our lives do we get trapped in the same routine over and over and over, no matter how much we don’t like the results that we are achieving?

What habits or routines just don’t work?

Timers and check lists work for me. I don’t have to do the same thing every single day, but if I decide what I want to accomplish during the day and how much time I need to dedicate to it, then discipline my self to use the timer, I am capable of accomplishing so much. So why don’t I use these tools every day?

My diet and health regime is NOT working for me! Why don’t I sit down for half an hour and make a plan of how to work healthier choices into my day? I am not into the habit of doing this, and I do have a habit of perfectionist thought that leaves me afraid to fail. Need to change this one.

Painting relaxes me. I sleep better after focusing on creating. I do this once a week. So once a week I tend to sleep better. Why can’t I work the habit of creating into my routine a couple more times a week?

My housework habits work amazingly if I incorporate the Fly Lady routine into my day to day life. But I have the habit of loosing my “control journal”. I need the habit of putting it away in the same spot at the end of the day.

Have you stopped and considered your habits lately? I challenge you to make a list, what works, what doesn’t. Then we can look at a plan to get our habits in check!

Are you ready to own your habits? Or are you still too comfortable having your habits own you?

BE THE MANAGER OF YOUR LIFE, MANAGE YOUR HABITS WELL!

Useful link : http://www.flylady.net/d/getting-started/

WOW! I AM AN ADDICT!

By: Just myself December 9, 2020

Blogrelationship, technology addiction, unpluggingLeave a Comment

Have you ever sat in silence? No music, no television, no book, no people chattering in the background. Not moving, just sitting.

I have discovered I can only maintain this state for moments! I am shocked!

Having the perfect opportunity to sit in silence this weekend, my mind enjoyed it for a few minutes, but it was not long till I felt an overwhelming urge to read a book, turn on music, watch t.v., work on my classes.

I did not reach for my journal to brain dump my thoughts. I did not engage in a conversation on …..whatever came to mind with my husband. My mind spun at a phenomenal rate from one subject to another. It felt awkward/uncomfortable, painful.

CONFESSION: I am fully addicted to brain stimulation!

Is this contributing to my inability to sleep through the night? Is this contributing to not being able to slow down and engage with my family in a more personal/intimate way?

Tim and I had discussed and decided before we left to not use the laptop or the t.v. while we were on our reboot weekend. It was very important to me to be able to write, talk, plan (SMART), read paper books, etc. Wow, one weekend, just two days, and I couldn’t do it!

What has the advancement of technology taken from us? I understand the gains it has given, but are we loosing the ability to be silent or engaged with each other or ourselves in a truly intimate way?

How do you practice unplugging?

By: Just myself December 9, 2020

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Time For Reflection

By: Just myself December 8, 2020

Blogcommunication, marriage, reflextion, relationship, time outLeave a Comment

We are home from our reboot weekend. It was a wonderful time spent together, without interruption or responsibility staring us down.

A time out, to listen to Tim’s heart cries. To discuss our dreams and goals, and to just pause from the pressures of life.

Seventeen years ago, I made vows in front of God and witnesses to spend my life with Tim, until “death do us part”. I was so “in love” with him, the world was bright and beautiful and I had no doubts in my mind that God himself had put us together for His great purpose.

I still believe that we were put together by God. But let me tell you it has not always been easy to stick to those promises I made that day. We have come so close to the breaking point, the point of no return.

Life gets busy, bills, illness, stress, physical and mental exhaustion, old habits, perceptions, children, the list goes on and on, all this comes and can destroy relationships.

We listen but do we hear? If we hear does the one we love know without a doubt that we have heard. I act like a human of many words, but I am training like an Olympic athlete to reduce my words out and increase my listening ability. I wonder if anyone has noticed yet?

I have a goal in life… In a world where relationships have become “disposable”. Where people bounce from relationship to relationship, from marriage to marriage, where single mom Christmas commercials have become the “norm”, I want to use my life lessons, my education to help those that want to make changes in their life, to make their relationships spectacular. I myself can NOT fix your relationship, but I have a tool box of tools to share with you if YOU are ready to do the work. (Note: I have the utmost respect for single parents, I was one.)

I continue learning to use the tools my education and life has provided to take my relationship to the next level. Hopefully my heart will remain open so the lessons are not so painful.

Everyday it becomes clearer to me, love is not a feeling, love is an action. Love is a choice to move. Sometimes it is easy to love, sometimes it is painful. But if it is genuine LOVE CONQUERS ALL!

Foundation Fix

By: Just myself December 5, 2020

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Not so much a fix per say but more a regular maintenance is in order this weekend.

I have found that as much as I try to not allow COVID to effect my life, my spiritual connections have taken a real beating. I miss my church community! Some how the ritual of rushing out the door Sunday morning to praise and worship together resets my mind for the rest of the week.

Our business has been extremely busy this year with lots of people completing the home projects they have been putting off for years and so we have rushed through the summer, working, working, working. Neglecting my focused prayer( GUESS THAT IS ANOTHER CONFESSION) life and just praying on the go, and ignoring my husband’s frustrated cries, with a “just keep going, or one foot in front of the other reply”.

Oh wow, I guess I really do need a foundation fixer upper!

My husband is exhausted, our spirit relationship is neglected, our foundation has a crack in it, and our home is at risk of falling down!

EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY!

Friends I am about to unplug for the rest of today, all of tomorrow, and most of Monday! I plan on plugging back into the Source. And sharing with my husband in a renewal weekend.

If you are married I strongly suggest that you do this on a regular bases.

Get away, whether that is behind closed bedroom doors, or as we do from time to time, off to a favourite destination.

A friend asked me if I was going to get some new lingerie. What a tantalizing thought! I considered this for a bit. But the importance of getting away together is to become bare, unhidden, honest.

God put us together, as he put Adam and Eve in the garden. They shared their life together, they were unhindered by barriers, they were naked and honest and they “had no shame”. If you cannot be naked together with your spouse your relationship needs work, do it now before it is too late.

More importantly if you can’t be naked with God your very life is in danger, do it now, without any shame!

I have so much more to say on this subject, but for now, my Lord, and my lord are waiting for my attention!

Two Ears, One Mouth

By: Just myself December 4, 2020

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Although hard to admit, sometimes my ego runs away and makes itself very important by wanting everyone to hear what happens to be floating through my mind.

It interrupts others because it’s opinion is so relevant that it just can’t wait one more minute to be heard.

It believes, on occasion, it owns the only right opinion, and has nothing to learn from anyone else.

One of my top seven areas of life to improve upon is to teach my ego to LISTEN ACTIVELY FIRST!

In doing so I expect improved relationships, and a higher quality of professionalism.

LIFE INTERRUPTION!

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CONFESSION: I am a trained professional, and in my personal life I keep returning to my old habits, over and over. I act passive aggressive and acting in such a way has the power to destroy!